Good questions are the most powerful tools that open the doors to conversations that were once closed and help us grow from stagnation.
- Through this article, we will understand why we have lost our instinct to ask questions.
- We will learn specific questioning techniques that drive relationships and growth.
- We will discover how questions become our greatest competitive advantage in the AI era.
Why Have We Lost Our Instinct to Ask Questions?
Young children constantly ask, “Why is this like this?” and “Why is the sky blue?” Humans are born as questioning beings, but as we grow up, we gradually stop asking questions. Where has all that curiosity gone?
Curiosity: The Instinct That Makes Our Brains Dance
According to neuroscience, when we feel curiosity, our brains release ‘dopamine’, which is responsible for pleasure and motivation. In other words, the act of questioning and learning is a ‘reward’ and ‘pleasure’ for the brain itself. Stopping to ask questions may be akin to the brain voluntarily giving up this enjoyable play. Restarting the questioning process is about reclaiming lost intellectual pleasure and awakening the dormant brain.
The First Step to Growth: “What Do I Not Know?”
The ancient philosopher Socrates emphasized the wisdom of ‘knowing what I do not know’, or ’the knowledge of ignorance (無知의 知)’. All true knowledge begins with the awareness of ’not knowing’.
However, today we easily fall into the ‘illusion of knowledge’ where we think we know everything because we can instantly find answers through internet searches. The ‘Google effect’ makes us feel that we do not need to think deeply since we can retrieve information from external sources whenever needed. This is one of the decisive reasons we have stopped asking questions. The first step to asking truly good questions is to courageously face the state of ’not knowing’ by turning off the internet for a moment.
Specific Techniques for Crafting Good Questions
Good questions are not innate but are a skill that can be learned and practiced. Just mastering a few key techniques can completely change the quality of your conversations and thoughts.
The Difference Between ‘Open Questions’ and ‘Closed Questions’
Closed questions are those that end with a ‘yes/no’ or short answer, like “Did you have lunch?” They are useful for fact-checking but can easily interrupt conversations.
In contrast, open questions encourage the other person to freely express their thoughts and feelings, like “What was the most fun thing that happened at school today?” They have the powerful ability to open the other person’s heart, form deeper relationships, and gain unexpected new information. I also have many experiences in the past where I faced awkward silences by only asking survey-like closed questions such as “What do you usually do on weekends?” But when I changed it to an open question like “What was the most enjoyable weekend you’ve had recently, and what did you do then?”, I felt the conversation became much richer as the other person excitedly shared their experiences.
A Universal Tool for Mapping Thoughts: 5W1H
Who, When, Where, What, Why, How. The 5W1H principle is the most systematic questioning tool for organizing complex thoughts and understanding the essence of problems. Even vague weekend travel plans can transform into a concrete project by starting with “What is the purpose of this trip? (Why)” and sequentially asking 5W1H questions. Thus, 5W1H is a powerful questioning method that systematically develops thoughts and maps out problem-solving.
The ‘Attitude’ of Questioning: Genuine Curiosity
As important as what questions to ask is the attitude with which you ask them. Avoid ’teacher-like questions’ that seem to test the other person or ‘accusatory questions’ like “Why do you always look like that?” The essence of good questions lies in genuine curiosity. It is important to listen purely to the other person’s story and maintain an attitude of listening attentively after asking questions.
Life Questions Catalog for Immediate Use in Various Situations
When You Want Deeper Relationships
- “What brings you the most joy or laughter these days?”
- “Is there something you did this year that you would like to praise yourself for, saying ‘I really did well’?”
- “If you could pass on just one lesson learned in life to the next generation, what would it be?”
When You Want to Find a Breakthrough to a Problem
- “Is the problem we are trying to solve really the ‘real problem’? What is the essence of this problem?”
- “If my wise self at 90 were to advise my current self, what would they say about this problem?”
- “How would this problem look if viewed from the completely opposite perspective? For example, what if this problem is actually an ‘opportunity’?”
When You Want to Meet the Real ‘You’
- “If I were completely free from money, time, and the opinions of others, what would I be doing right now?”
- “What are the three values I consider most important in my life, and how close was my day today to those values?”
- “If I were to look back at today’s self ten years from now, what would I regret not having done?”
Comparison/Alternatives
| Question Type | Characteristics | When to Use? |
|---|---|---|
| Closed Questions | Induces ‘yes/no’ or short answers. Can interrupt conversations. | Fact-checking, quick information gathering, starting a conversation. |
| Open Questions | Induces longer descriptive answers. Facilitates sharing of thoughts and feelings. | Deep conversations, relationship building, exploring ideas, understanding the other person. |
| 5W1H Questions | Systematically identifies the context of the situation (Who, When, Where, What, Why, How). | Problem analysis, planning, reporting, grasping the overall picture of a situation. |
| Reflective Questions | Encourages exploration of inner values, beliefs, motivations, and emotions. | Self-understanding, important decision-making, personal growth. |
| AI Prompts | Specifies clear roles, specific contexts, and desired formats for outcomes. | Generating information, creation, analysis, problem-solving using AI. |
Checklist or Step-by-Step Guide
Enhancing Competitiveness Through Questions in the AI Era
With the emergence of generative AI like ChatGPT, the way we handle knowledge has fundamentally changed. Now, ‘answers’ have become a common resource, and the ability to ask ’the right questions’ has become true competitiveness.
Asking good questions to AI is like giving a chef a detailed recipe. A vague request like “Make me delicious food” yields ordinary results, but a specific recipe like “Make aglio e olio pasta, adding plenty of garlic and enhancing the spiciness with peperoncino” produces excellent dishes. Here are five steps to make AI a great ’thinking partner’.
- Assign a Role: Giving AI a specific identity, like “You are a brand marketer with 20 years of experience,” changes the professionalism of the output.
- Provide Specific Context: Describe background information as thoroughly as possible, such as “Plan a surfing trip to Yangyang, Gangwon-do, for an active couple in their 30s, within a budget of 500,000 won.”
- Specify Desired Output Format: Clearly request the desired output format, such as “Organize the discussed content into a table.” or “Explain it in a casual tone as if speaking to a close friend.”
- Show Examples: Providing good examples, like “Write a poem similar in tone to the example below. [Insert example poem]”, helps AI learn your preferences more accurately.
- Develop Through Conversation: Instead of trying to ask the perfect question all at once, continue the conversation with follow-up questions based on AI’s responses to enhance the quality of the output.
Conclusion
Questions go beyond merely seeking answers. When we properly understand and utilize the value of questions, our lives can become broader and deeper.
- Key Point 1: Questions are a pleasurable play that our brains instinctively pursue, and the awareness of ‘I do not know’ is the starting point of all growth.
- Key Point 2: By mastering techniques like ‘open questions’ and 5W1H, we can dramatically enhance the quality of our conversations and thoughts.
- Key Point 3: Competitiveness in the AI era comes not from the ability to find answers but from the ability to create valuable questions.
Your world will expand as much as the size and depth of the questions you ask. What is the first question you want to ask today after closing this article?
References
- Questions Change Answers: Good Questions are Tools for Life Link
- Questions That Changed the World - Yes24 Link
- The Power of Questions | Oh Jung-hwan - Kyobo Bookstore Link
- Neuroscience and Learning Ability - Brunch Link
- Human Curiosity and Existential Scientific Intelligence - Brunch Link
- The Neuroscience of Curiosity - Crema Club Link
- Why Do People Want to Know? Link
- Socrates, Know Thyself | Saenggeul Saenggeul Link
- AI Diminishes Your Memory - Weekly Chosun Link
- The Internet Changes Brain Structure - Science Times Link
- Open Questions vs. Closed Questions - Gyeongbuk Ilbo Link
- Closed Questions, Open Questions - Jeju Ilbo Link
- Meeting Planning According to the 5W1H Principle - Brunch Link
- Good Questions and Bad Questions - KSAM Magazine Link
- If You Want to Deepen Relationships, Ask Questions Like This - YouTube Link
- Icebreaker Questions for Team Building - Asana Link
- The Seven Powers of Questions - Aladin Link
- Five Tips for Writing ChatGPT Prompts Link
- Proper Questioning Methods in the AI Era - GS Caltex Media Hub Link
- Examples of Prompt Engineering Methods - Modulabs Link